Thursday, 13 September 2012

Beautiful People

Good morning, world!  I was tired of fighting with the sleepless night, so I figured I'd wake up extra early and start writing as I haven't in a very long time.

Just a quick update for any of you far away friends or family members that like to keep tabs on what's happening in my crazy life...I am now on the salon floor at Diva!  It's truly so exciting to move out of reception and onto what I'm truly passionate about.  I started a few weeks ago by just taking models (haircuts are free and colours only pay product cost, which is under $30) and this serves as a chance for me to show off what I can do for my managers.  Once they decide I am ready and capable, they allow me to start taking actual paying clients.  I did models for 3 shifts and was then allowed to start booking women's cuts, kids cuts, and blow-dry styles.  Exciting!!  It's so cool to watch your books fill up with both request clients and new clients, and it's even more cool to watch those new clients become request clients.  I'm seriously as giddy as a kid on Christmas, I am so ridiculously passionate about my work.

I've been busting my non-existent balls trying to get ahead on my hours in school, going in extra days trying to make up for lost time.  I'm almost where I need to be to graduate on time, but that's not good enough for me as I've set a personal goal to be finished at the institute before Christmas.  I adore every single person that I've met at school and I do believe that some of them will be life-long friends, but I am so ready to move on with my life.  Especially now that I'm actually building a clientele outside of school.  I am ready to start making money and living my life again.

Anyway, this won't be a long post as there's really nothing more to my life other than school, work, eat, sleep (sometimes) and repeat.  Actually, on the topic of sleep, for the last few nights I haven't been able to, partly because I have a wicked cold, and partly because I can't turn my stupid brain off and ALL I do is dream of hair!!  It's exhausting!  It's the kind of sleep where you toss and turn and flop furiously around your bed trying to think of something other than work, work, work, but it's all you can do and you end up feeling like you never even got a rest at all.  It's terrible.  I'm not sure how to fix it, but I may need to invest an hour every night when I get home to something alternative to really shut my mind off of work.  But when you immerse yourself in something so completely and there's really no other substance to your life, no time for hobbies, no time for a break...I guess it does consume you.

My poor boyfriend.  He has to put up with me through these crazy sleepless nights when I often catch myself talking out loud about hair colour formulas at 3am.

Other than that, all I can say is that I continue to feel unbelievably blessed every single day with the people in my life.  I have met such an incredible group of people here in Calgary, and I'm happier than I ever imagined I'd be out here.  I can't believe it's almost been a full year since the day I packed my life into my little silver dodge and made the trip back to the city where I was born.  But it was the best decision I've ever made and I'm happy to plant my roots here.  Come to think of it, I think they've always been planted here.

It's true what they say;

"You can take the girl out of Alberta, but you can't take Alberta out of the girl."

Have a great day my friends.

xo-ac

Sunday, 12 August 2012

A small, simple update


I feel like I always find time to blog when I'm in Kelowna.

I really don't have much to say.  I've had the most relaxing, wonderful 10 days in Kelowna and Osoyoos.  We haven't done much.  Just beaches, beers, pools, wine, food, friends and family.

One of the main highlights of this trip was the little 3-day mini vacation that Sean and I took in Osoyoos.  We stayed at a resort called Spirit Ridge, which is attached to the Nk'Mip winery…what a stunning property.  Our suite had a lake and vineyard view, a full kitchen, giant fluffy king bed, two fireplaces, a BBQ, and a private outdoor jacuzzi on our patio overlooking the lake.  It was nothing short of amazing.  On the last night, Sean and I had dinner at the restaurant at Nk'Mip after a wine tasting and it was one of the most incredible nights of my life.  Our table overlooked the lake and the valley, the weather was warm and still and perfect, the sunset spectacular, and the food and wine were amazing.  Neither of us wanted to leave.

Another highlight for me personally was getting on a Stand-up Paddle Board for the first time.  What a thrill.  I can't believe how much I enjoyed it…you'd think that it would be boring, just standing there and paddling around, but not only is it a complete blast, but it's also an incredible workout.  If I still lived in Kelowna I would have bought one right then and there.  Sean fell off of his probably 6 or 7 times, and I fell off once when the boat wakes knocked me over.  I'm hoping we get to get back on the paddle boards before we leave tomorrow.

Back to real life is going to be a slight smack in the tits.  I've missed so much school…I have almost two hundred hours to make up before graduation.  I'm going to have to start going in one more day than I already do…and working just as much…so I will probably be back up around 80 hours a week.  Siiiiiggghh.  But this vacation has been an amazing recharge…and not it's pedal to the metal until graduation in December.  I just can't wait.  It's time to get going on "real life"…and Sean has plans to further his education in the near future as well, so we both have some work ahead of us.  But, the rewards and benefits will be well worth all of this hard work, and I'm slowly starting to see that now.

The future is bright.

xo ac

Friday, 13 July 2012

Small Stuff

The craziest thing happened to me this week. I ran into someone who I hadn't seen in a long time. Someone who ignited thoughts and memories of pain, betrayal, deceit and heartache. Someone who had hurt me in the past. Someone who I was harboring so much pent up and pointless anger towards. When I saw them, my heart felt nothing but joy. Excitement. Happiness. Gratitude. Because not only did all of those things that seemed so incredibly catastrophic at the time suddenly diminish into simple little nothing's, but I also realized that all of those simple little nothing's led me directly to where I am today. "Don't sweat the small stuff. And, it really is ALL small stuff."

Tuesday, 19 June 2012

My Baby

In October of 2010, I played an opening performance at my friend Jessica Myroon's CD release party at The Habitat in Kelowna for the release of her first album.  I was so moved and inspired by this amazing young girl (she was only 16 at the time) releasing her very own album.  So many people came out to support her, and the energy in that tiny venue was stronger than anything I'd ever felt.  Jessica's success was enormous, and that was the night that I met her brother and producer, Tyler, for the first time.

After my opening performance Tyler approached me and we talked for a while about the possibility of recording an album.  I loved the way that Jessica's album held the preservation of everything natural about her music.  Nothing was overproduced, and nothing was perfect.  It was a pure, imperfectly beautiful replication of her music.  And that's exactly what I wanted to be able to create for myself.

My biggest pet peeve in the world of recorded music is the overproduction of it all.  Don't get me wrong, I love the hottest auto-tuned pop song just as much as the next girl, but when it comes to true, raw, beautiful talent...I find that the true elements of gorgeousness in the vocals and the rhythms often get overlooked and lost in the production stages.  And there is nothing worse than seeing a band or an artist live and feeling that "oh, they sounded way better on recording..." feeling.  I'd rather it be the opposite, actually.

After scraping together a few measly dollars, I made it my 2011 goal to complete this album.  I even put off my education another year in order to pursue it.  The second weekend in January, I held a big fundraiser show at the bistro where I was working.  I couldn't believe how many people showed up...and how much money I raised with my "entrance by donation" approach.  It was such a simple show, just me and a few musical friends of mine, 2 small amps and my outdated equipment.  But it set in stone the promise that I was going to actually do this.

I began recording at West Ave Studios in Salmon Arm a week later.  The 90 minute drive there and back gave me a lot of time to warm up my vocals (I remember that Carrie Underwood was my best friend on those drives) and reflect on what I really wanted this album to be.  And for what Tyler and I had to work with in the small, developing studio, and the fact that he was simply one producer and I was simply one musician, I am proud to say that this album has blown every expectation that I ever had for it WAY out of the water.

Everything was completed by July of 2011, and I was in the planning stages of a CD release, when life took a major turn and in less than two weeks I was on my way to Calgary, AB, with my entire life packed into my tiny Dodge Neon.  I had to cancel upcoming shows as I suddenly was moving to another province.  My move to Calgary was a long time coming (I had been planning it for 3 years) but still all happened so fast when I actually decided to go for it.  Life got incredibly crazy from that moment forward, as I began working two serving jobs and trying to get used to my new city, my new apartment, my new friends and some other major personal life changes.  Fall turned to Winter and all of a sudden, boom, I was in School.  Just like that.  Everything about the album had been put on hold, and I actually still haven't written a single song worth recording since I left Kelowna.  Life has just been too busy.

I felt guilty and discouraged when I let myself realize that over half a year had passed since the completion of the album, and it was still just sitting there, lifeless.  I had myself convinced that in order to release it, I had to have a release show, hard copies of the album to sell, and all of my ducks in a row for online distribution as well.  This would have cost thousands of dollars that I didn't have, and not to mention that I have spent most of my life in Calgary working between 60 to 110 hours per week.

I came down with a brutal flu a few weeks ago that put me out of commission for a few days, and I took advantage of the extra time in bed to piece together my album release.  I decided that an online release is not only better for my wallet (and yours) but it is also exponentially more environmentally friendly.  So I just went for it, kind of sporadically, and now ten days later, My Baby has been born!  I still have 6 months to go until I am finished school, and I'm working on top of that, so I won't have much time for performances or promotion until early 2013.  But I figured simply getting my music out there was one small step in the right direction, and I promise you all, that there is much, much more to come.  Life just has to settle down a little bit, and my priorities will eventually shift back to where I truly want them...

I just wanted to write this post to anyone who is reading to basically say Thank You.  Thank You for your love, Thank You for your support, Thank You for your inspiration, Thank You for coming to my shows, Thank You for buying my album, Thank You for waiting so patiently, Thank You for never rolling your eyes or laughing at me when I came up with this crazy idea, Thank You for standing by me even when I went MIA for weeks at a time, Thank You for sharing my music with your friends, and most of all, Thank You for believing in me, even when I didn't.

There is a lot of heart and soul laid out in this album.  Some of the songs are 5 years old and some of them are recent.  One was even written in 1979 by my incredible aunt Connie right before she passed away.  I know it's only 7 songs, but every single word means something enormous to me.  As many of you know, I get pretty emotionally involved with my music.  And, for that reason, this album truly does feel like My Baby.  I loved it, nurtured it, fed it and watched it grow, and I didn't ever kick it in the teeth when it was pissing me off to no end, even though some days I really, REALLY wanted to.

I sincerely hope you enjoy it.

xo-ac






Thursday, 24 May 2012

Recharged


For a change of scenery, I decided to write this blog post from the comfort of the passenger seat of Sean's car as we bomb down the Trans Canada highway.  I'm trying to avoid motion sickness so that I don't FROW UP (which I usually do) but I figured if I didn't write this post now, then I probably never will.

First off, I sincerely hope all of you lovelies had a fantastic May long weekend.  The weather was apparently pretty shitty in Calgary so we were both very happy to be in Kelowna, even though it wasn't too much better…we did manage to get one nice day in on the boat though.  That was awesome.  I got to show Sean a lot of the sights, which was cool because I got to play tourist as well.  We went to a few wineries, did a tiny tiny bit of hiking (not as much as I had hoped) saw a lot of different places and spent some quality time with the family and the beagle!  It was a nice break for sure…even if I did spend all day Monday cutting and colouring the entire family's hair.

I didn't have much of a chance to see any friends while I was back, which I find crazy because I was back for an entire 5 days, but I just get myself so goddamn tired when I'm in Calgary living my stupid crazy life.  Not to mention that I also get sick of people in general.  It was nice to just kind of unplug and unwind and not focus on much of anything for a little while.

During my visit I also had some appointments to try and figure out what the hell is going on with my health.  I told my doctor about how sick I have been, and that I have cut dairy and gluten from my diet completely.  He said that's wonderful, because your body doesn't NEED dairy or gluten to function, and in most cases they're actually more hinder than help anyway.  The unfortunate thing is that I didn't really get any answers as to what to do about it.  

Unfortunately, there is no test in existence that can determine whether or not a person is lactose intolerant, so I guess it's just a matter of not eating what makes you feel sick.  So I guess I'm doing the right thing by just simply not eating dairy.

As far as the celiac/gluten thing goes, there is a blood test that exists to test gluten allergy and sensitivity.  So thats good news.  However, they can't actually test for that unless you have gluten in your system, in order to see how it reacts with your blood and body.  So in order to take this test, I basically need to find a 3 month period in my life where I can eat a lot of gluten for 3 months, feel like shit, and then take the blood test.  Obviously that time is not going to arise any time soon (or ever, who the fuck has time to feel like shit for 3 months!?) so I have been advised to just keep doing what I'm doing and simply not eat any of it.

Another thing that my doctor did suggest is slowly experimenting with certain things and keeping a journal on how they make me feel.  For example, one day I may have a glass of milk, another day a slice of bread…etc. etc. just so I can see how individual foods make me feel, because sometimes people will just be sensitive to a few items instead of dairy or gluten as a whole.

So that's the update kids.  I've got a lot of work and bellyaches ahead but hopefully in a few years I'll know what the fuck is really happening all up in my digestive GRILLZ…and of course I will keep you posted.

In other news, life is actually pretty wonderful.  I feel very lucky to have somehow caught an absolutely wonderful boyfriend.  I've never had anyone love me so completely or treat me so well in my entire life.  We actually have a pretty cute story behind us…but I think I will save that for another time.

xo-ac

Friday, 11 May 2012

Keep on keepin' on

Welcome to another blog post from my iPhone on the train. Somewhere between the smelly person in front of me and the snoring man a few rows back I am finding my focus aboard Calgary Transit once again. It has been an incredibly turbulent few weeks which is why I haven't posted in so long. I got the news that I had to leave my apartment 4 weeks ago on Friday night, which was devastating, and I was moved out and into my new place by Sunday afternoon. Talk about gettin 'er done. But I am now all settled in my new condo (which I absolutely adore more than I ever dreamed I would) and we had the official inspection and move out of our old apartment last Tuesday. Glad that whole stressful chapter is behind me. I also transferred locations within my salon last week. Working way up north when it would sometimes take me 90 minutes just to get to work was really wearing on me (and the little free time I already had) so I am much, much happier to be working at a mall in the south that takes me 15 minutes to drive to. The staff there are so wonderful and I've truly never felt that I fit in so quickly. Another major change I've had to face in these last few weeks is that I found out I have developed celiac disease and a lactose allergy/sensitivity. I have yet to be officially diagnosed as it requires an extensive amount of blood work and allergy testing (not exactly my forte) but I did speak with a doctor who explained that given my symptoms and reactions to dairy and wheat, that is almost certainly what it is. He said its something he's been seeing a lot of in people my age, probably to do with all of the chemicals and hormones added to the foods that we eat nowadays, and that I may eventually grow out of it, but based on my history it's probably something that I have been suffering from minorly for my entire life. Party hey? To make a long story longer I have completely cut wheat and dairy out of my life cold turkey since I found this out 4 weeks ago. No more bread, pasta, cheese, milk, yogurt, chocolate (I know) or many sauces containing balsamic vinegar or worcestershire..it's been a learning experience. Grocery shopping now takes me three times as long and costs me double what it used to..and attempting to eat out at restaurants or fast food joints is an unimaginable struggle. I've learned to cook a lot of my own staples that I'd otherwise took for granted. What a fun year this is shaping up to be! At least it's not uneventful... Anyway.  School is still clippin right along..I'm still loving it.. I just can't believe it's possible for a person to even function when they are as mentally, physically and completely exhausted as I am right now. I'm so grateful to have such an incredible support system behind me..between FaceTime sessions with my family in BC and the support from my boyfriend and all my wonderful friends..it's actually kind of sad to see the toll this school year is taking on all of us. We started with so much energy and passion..and now we just walk around like zombies following any scent of coffee that we may catch. Most of us are doing 80+ hours a week between school and work, one of my friends even goes to school for 36 hours a week, is a flight attendant at westjet, AND a server at moxies. How he isn't dead yet, I have no idea. It's going to be really rough pushing through all the way until December with no breaks at all. But the sun is still shining and the weather is getting warmer, which means the days are getting longer, and that makes us all feel a hell of a lot better. It's not even half over yet. Onwards and upwards! Take care of yourselves darlings. xo ac

Wednesday, 4 April 2012

Leaving on a Jet Plane

I'm on a plane right now flying from Calgary to Kelowna. Would you believe me if I said that only 2 hours ago I had no idea that I'd be on a plane tonight?

Today is Tuesday. My original plan was to drive to Kelowna on Thursday, but since the highways were looking pretty sketchy, I decided to fly instead. Being the daughter of a westjet employee, I get to fly standby..which means that flights are ridiculously cheap. It also means that my life is more often than not a clusterfucked ball of stress and pigeon shit when I do attempt to travel. This was one of those times.

Thursday's flight booked up and sold out, as did the rest of the flights that day. I spent my sporadic short breaks at work trying to get rid of my TWO different 8 hour shifts on Wednesday (I call this my sacrificial hump day in which I slave 19 hours in order to have Sundays off) and I finally succeeded, only to have all flights for Wednesday sell out as well. So now I'm at work, an hour away from my apartment, scheduled to work til 9:15, I have nothing but the uniform on my back, and the only possible flight I can get out on is at 10pm tonight. Fuck.

Anyway, as I'm sure you can imagine, it all worked out. I called my roommate with a list of things to throw in a bag for me, got Marva to drive to my apartment and pick it up and drive it all the freaking way up north to my work, I left work 15 minutes early leaving one of the poor stylists like a deer in headlights to run the front desk, and somehow managed to get my ass in a seat by the skin of my teeth just in time.

Once, just ONCE,  I'd love to fly confirmed. I laugh at the people who act all stressed out who fly confirmed. Just kidding. (But not really.)

I'm really looking forward to this long weekend in Kelowna. Going back there often depresses me a little because it kind of tears up my heart and makes me wonder where my home truly is. It's always hard to revisit old memories and to feel comfortable in the safety net of your parents house and your childhood neighborhood...only to be thrown back into the hurricane mess of your own life in another province a few days later.

Things have been rough lately. Between financial snags and emotional relationships and struggles with school and work and sickness..it's been a little much. I've never looked or felt more physically and mentally exhausted in my life. 110 hours a week is spreading me way too thin, and I am losing focus and unable to reach my full potential in either school or work. My health is poor and I'm truly losing my mind, in every sense. On top of all that, my lease is being terminated by my landlords in 27 days, and I just found out yesterday. So I somehow have to figure out a new living situation now too.

I know things will eventually come together and all work out..as they always do..but that doesn't make me feel much better right now. I'm hoping these few days in Kelowna will help to recharge me and give me a chance to breathe and regain some positive focus and inspiration.

I really just can't wait to hug my beagle and get on a hiking trail tomorrow.

xo ac

Saturday, 3 March 2012

Unicorns

It's 8am on Saturday morning and I'm sitting in my car in the mall parking lot, sincerely hoping that nobody sees me...I was here 15 minutes ago, almost 45 minutes early for work. I guess the commute time is a little less when it's not rush hour..ha. Who knew.

I have my first real shift at the salon today so I wanted to be a little (extra super) early. Now I'm faced with an extra 30 minutes to kill so I figured I'd write for you fine folks.

The other night at work my colleague and I started discussing the concept of a 'unicorn'. This was a term I'd never heard before (other than the mythical creature of course) so she explained it to me. A unicorn is that one perfect, beautiful, unattainable person that we all have in our lives. You know that, given the chance, you two would be absolute perfection together, but because of so many given circumstances, be it timing, distance, other people being in the way or what have you, there's never been a time that you've been able to give it an honest shot.

If you're  reading this right now, I know that you're sitting there thinking about your unicorn. Because we all have one.

Why does the world do that to us? Torture us with the knowledge that there IS in fact someone out there who is exactly what you want and need; completely flawless, yet you are prevented from actually manifesting anything from it, ever. Sick.

When I think about it, though, my Unicorn has served so many incredible purposes in my life. He has been a constant reminder of what I truly want, not just in a partner but in LIFE itself. It's just cruel to sit there for hours and put yourself through the agony of wondering 'what if'...and it's even more painful to ask yourself 'why not'...it drives me insane.

Anyway. Those are my random thoughts for the morning. I'm going to head into work now.

Fucking unicorns.

Wednesday, 29 February 2012

February 2012 Portfolio

The following photos are a sample of some of the work I have done this month so far.

Above: Contrasting colours in my sister Erika's hair

Above: Finished color in Erika's hair (she didn't want to show her face)
She is a level 2 Brown on the under layers of her hair, with level 9 and 10 blonde highlights on top of her level 6 natural blonde.  I finished her look with a long triangle layer cut while trying not to eliminate any of her existing length.

Erika didn't feel as though we had made enough of a statement in her new hair colours, so we added a few single purple fashion color panels throughout the sides and in her fringe

January 2012 Portfolio

Promotional Boudoir Photoshoot with Vanessa Ross Photography (http://vanessarossphotography.com/) All hair was done by me...we had a really wonderful time working with all of these beautiful ladies.  So many different kinds of beautiful.






Things I learned from Tristin Morrison

Today I went into school on my morning off to attend a 3 hour haircutting seminar and demonstration taught by Tristin Morrison (http://www.tristinmorrison.com/) who is the senior creative director for Aveda Canada.  I was so excited to meet him and see him in action...however I did not expect for him to change my life in the way that he did.  Below are just a couple of things I took away from today's presentation.


1. The average Stylist in Canada makes $26,000.00 annually.
This figure absolutely floored me.  $26,000.00!?  That's pitiful.  Especially when the course itself costs at least half of that.  Tristin really gave all of us starry-eyed students a wake up call today.  Becoming a six figure income stylist is my ultimate goal.  I'd like to say it's in my five year plan, but, realistically it's probably better suited to my ten year plan (by the time I'm 30).  He made us realize just how hard we're actually going to have to work to get to that point.  This isn't a career for the faint of heart.  And to become an "average" stylist and work in an "average" salon and make the "average" annual income of $26,000.00 is what a lot of students are going to end up doing.  I've never been average, and I'm never going to be average.  Tristin, for lack of a better expression, lit a fire under my ass in showing me just how much dedication and sacrifice will go into becoming exceptional in my field.

2. Immersion is Key.
There are going to be times when your craft and your art need to take priority over absolutely everything else in the world.  To become a master, it is essential to immerse yourself completely into the world of hair and fashion.

3. Never Stop Learning.
We work in a field where trends and techniques are ever-changing and evolving all the time.  Like Tristin and so many others, I find my greatest passion comes from education.  The salon where I began working this week actually requires their staff to participate in a minimum of 5 educational events each year.  Sometimes there is a large cost or time commitment involved.  But you will not be a successful stylist if you ever put your learning to an end.

4. Kiss Regular Schedules Goodbye.
This one is probably the hardest for me to digest.  The rest of the world goes to work Monday - Friday, 9 - 5.  When do people get their hair done?  When they're not working, of course!  This is when the busiest times for a stylist begin to arise.  You must accept a life in which evenings and weekends will almost always be a time for work.

5. It Is Very Difficult To Have a Family in this Industry.
Because of everything stated above, mainly the scheduling issues, having a family proves to be especially challenging for stylists who are truly passionate in becoming successful in their art.  When you have children and wives and husbands who need care and attention during the evenings and weekends (when you are at work) life may become very interesting.  I also plan to do a great deal of work in my career as a stylist that will require me to travel.  A lot.  Do the math.


This may all sound wildly discouraging to the average reader.  Today was actually a spectacularly positive and inspirational turning point for me.  To me, these challenges are something that I am choosing not to see as "challenges" at all, but rather as opportunities.  Opportunities to push myself to my absolute limits and to keep moving forward to a life that I can not wait to be living.

It's certainly not for everyone.

xo-ac

Tuesday, 21 February 2012

The Universe Will Provide

I'm quite a sight for sore eyes right now.  It's 10:00am on a Tuesday and I am sitting on the living room couch in my parents house in Kelowna in plaid PJ pants and leopard print slipper socks.  I've got a beagle to my left and a giant bowl of strawberries on my right...it's safe to say that I'm pretty content!

I just wanted to update my lovely family and friends on the turn of events in my life this past week.  The last post I wrote was on the train on my way to the Aveda Red Chocolate class and I honestly had no idea how my life was going to change that day.  I spent 7 hours in a chair being fussed over and colored and re-colored and toned and glossed...I'm certainly not complaining, it was an incredible experience and I learned a ton.  (Not gonna lie, I looked pretty damn good once she was finished with me too!!)  All the hair models proceeded to the Palliser hotel to a big conference room so that we could be presented to the rest of the group of Aveda representatives.  After my presentation I was just about to run out to catch the train back home when Kelli, who is the head director at my school, waved me over.  She had been speaking to Jennifer, who manages four Aveda salonspas in Calgary called "Diva"...who was looking to hire somebody from the institute.  She really liked my "look" and the way that I presented myself in front of the group, so I guess she asked Kelli about my work ethic and, after receiving positive reviews (phew!), she really wanted to meet with me.  I went and introduced myself, we had a brief chat, and the next morning at 10am I found myself in her office being offered the position.

Somehow I managed to convince my manager at the pub to let me stay on one night a week (I have to make money somehow...haha) and I managed to work out a perfect schedule at the salon as well.  I am pulling almost 110 hours a week between work and school, which is absolutely insane, but like everything else in my crazy life, I will make it work.  I get every second Sunday off (HIKING HERE I COME!!!!!!) so that will be awesome as well...my shortest work days will be 12 hours long...haha...I'm just trying not to think about it.  I need to stay focused on my health and my wellbeing in order to NOT burn myself out completely in the next 10 months.  It's going to be tight for sure...especially financially...and I thought I was already on a tight budget.  I'm taking a substantial pay cut in order to take this opportunity but to me, it's worth it.

I guess I won't be able to shop at the farmer's market anymore :( goodbye, fresh local produce...hello, president's choice superstore brand...haha...

I think it's a small price to pay.  It's going to be so worth it.

Big dreams people, BIG DREAMS.  And Jennifer is so ridiculously supportive...I have never felt more sure of anything.

The universe has a funny way of dropping things into your lap RIGHT when you need them (even if you don't necessarily realise that you need them yet)...I can't even begin to explain how grateful I am right now. 

It's going to be a wild ride.  Good thing I live off of passion and adrenaline instead of food and sleep.  ;)


xo-ac

Tuesday, 14 February 2012

Happy Valentine's Day!

I am writing this post while on the train. I am not quite sure how to feel about that. Anyway. Today I have a 'day off'...which I sometimes get once a week (it's magical) and I'm heading downtown to my school as I am modeling for a hair coloring class called Red Chocolate. Can't wait to see what they do...it's being taught by the one and only David Adams (which is a huge deal to me) and then after that I'm headed to my Uncle's fiancé's house for Valentines Day dinner! My uncle lives and works in LA and wasn't able to make it home for V Day so Marv is putting on a 'Dinner for Lonely Hearts'..fair enough.

I don't think I'd go as far as to say that I am a lonely heart. I get lonely sometimes, sure, but the best part about being on my own right now is learning how to love my friends and family to the absolute maximum that I can. I have been so busy being a girlfriend for the last 4 years that I forgot how to be a good friend, a good sister, a good daughter. I'm re-learning what love means altogether and it's so refreshing! Now I look around me at all of these people in my life an cant believe how much love I have for them.

Valentine's day can often get blown out of proportion and taken out of context by the way that it's marketed to society. Commercialism is a bitch that way. Personally, I'm stoked to spend this day focusing all the love in my heart on the people I'm surrounded by...whoever they may be! I'm going to buy flowers for whoever ends up doing my hair at this class and bring little treats for everyone at dinner tonight. Just because you aren't currently in a romantic relationship doesn't mean this day can't be devoted to love!

At the same time, I did feel the pressure of V Day when I was asked to go out with a couple of different guys in the last little while. I wondered who the hell I was as I politely declined..because the old Me would have jumped at the chance to go on some romantic valentines date. I guess maybe I'm just not ready for anything like that right now. Or maybe I just didn't want to turn down a chance to enjoy Marva's cooking at the lonely hearts dinner. Who knows.

All I know is that I love love. And even though I'm not in love and don't even particularly want to be in love, it warms my heart to see all the people in this world that are. It's inspiring to know how such a strong feeling can take hold of your entire world and change your life in ways that you never even believed were possible. I've been lucky enough to feel it twice before, let it go, and watch life go on. I know it will come and go again. That's the thing about love. There are never guarantees, but it's one of the most beautiful elements of life on earth.

So whether you're in love, angry with love, fed up with love, inspired by love, or looking for love..I encourage you to spend this day loving everyone you possibly can. Guess what, random reader? I love YOU!

xo-ac

Friday, 10 February 2012

Keep Moving Forward

This big busy bustling city never seems to stop moving. At times I have been tempted to stand on the side of the road with a sign that says 'where the hell is everybody going?!'  It never ceases to amaze me that, whether it's Friday at 6pm or Tuesday at 4am, the city is rushing, and people are everywhere! Walking, running, driving, on the trains..where in the world could they all be going. Honestly.

I'm really looking forward to getting out of Calgary for a few days next week. I'm heading to Kelowna for the weekend for a quick visit with my dad and sister...it will be a blessing to break free from the rush for a while.

School is going well. It's consuming my life completely these days, when I'm not working at the bar. I have made a few tough decisions in the last few days, some financial cutbacks I was sad to make, and the beginning of what could have been a great relationship that I put to an end. But I felt myself losing focus of what is truly important right now..which is my education, a jumpstart on my career, and most importantly; what lies ahead.

I want to move to California in the next 3-5 years, which is what's keeping me going right now. It's a huge goal to strive for in such a short time as I have a lot to accomplish in order to find employment in a top salon in one of the hairstyling capitals of the world. But I'm driven and pushing forward harder than I even knew I could, and every time I lose focus I just bring myself to the thoughts of LA and my life there someday..and suddenly it all becomes worth it. Every overtime hour I pull at work, every day I suffer through on 3 hours of sleep, every social event I turn down because I need to practice my art, every box of Kraft dinner I eat to save towards the thousands of dollars I will need to permanently move my life to another country. It doesn't seem like that much of a sacrifice in the grand scheme of things.

I can't believe I've only been in school for a month. I've never learned so much so fast, and it blows my mind to think about how much I already know. I take my first real live human client in 7 days.  I've got freelance side work lined up for next month.

Life is finally falling together when only weeks ago I could have sworn it was falling apart.

xo-ac

Tuesday, 24 January 2012

A Glimmer of Pride

This post will probably seem a little weird...but I am basically going to write about how much I love my life.  So if you want to stop reading right now, I won't judge you.  It's 10:00am on a Tuesday morning and I finally have a day off...and I woke up so unbelievably chipper and optimistic that I just had to get my thoughts out.

I had a little bit of a moment of clarity last night...I woke up in the middle of the night, it must have been about 3 or 4 in the morning...and I sat up in bed and looked around my room.  I've lived here for just over 4 months now and it's suddenly become home within the last few weeks.  I got up and took a little walk around my 850 square foot apartment and almost started to cry just thinking about how happy I am living here.  I can't see myself leaving this apartment anytime soon, and I hope I never have to for any reason.  My job is a typical droning serving job in a dingy little neighborhood pub, but I love working there.  My school is amazing and every moment I spend there, I am throwing my heart and soul into my passion 100%.  Even on days like yesterday, when I honestly wanted to cry.  My roommate means the world to me, and I feel so lucky to have found her and to now be living with her so peacefully.  The people I have met in this city have changed my life for the better.  I never could have imagined growing this much in a 4 month time period, but I guess leaving everything you know will do that to you.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I am overwhelmed with my blessings.  I took a huge leap of faith by choosing this path with no real plan, and opened my heart to the universe, just hoping that it would take care of me...and sure enough, all of the tools and strength I needed were somehow provided to me.  All of those sleepless nights worrying and wondering if I'd made the right choice and if I was going to be able to make it on my own have finally paid off...I'm actually doing it.

I'm not on scholarship to an Ivy League university.  I'm not backpacking through Europe and enriching my life with ancient cultures.  I'm not volunteering overseas.  I'm not working towards scoring an apprenticeship with a prestigious company.  I don't have a job with a fat pay cheque where I get to wear heels and a pantsuit every day.  I live off of Chinese take-out and stay home watching Netflix because it's more financially appropriate for me than going out.  I drive a car that may kick the can any day now.  I live pay cheque to pay cheque and sometimes have to get creative with how I make ends meet.

But I'm doing a hell of a lot more than scared, terrified, safe me was doing a year ago.  And I'm doing it on my own, and that makes me feel so proud.  When we graduated high school 3 years ago, everyone had such enormous dreams; whether it was education or travel or money or love...but this is my dream, albeit small and maybe insignificant to some people...but I'm living in a city that I think is one of the most wonderful in the world, I'm attending the school of my dreams, and I even manage to pay all my bills AND buy my own Kraft Dinner.  If that's not gratification, then I don't know what is.

xo-ac

Wednesday, 18 January 2012

A Little Salvation from the January Blahs

Some of the sickest, most twisted, darkest music I've ever heard in my life.  At the same time, you will find clarity and beauty, the music will provoke your thoughts,  the lyrics will persuade you to question your deepest and most personal conflicts, and if you're anything like me, you will be slowly pulled into an absolute trance of musical genius that will leave you feeling simply confused afterwards.  I recommend you start by downloading the album entitled "Thursday" and listen to "Wicked Games" first.  If that sounds too complicated for you, just follow this link...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o9PuAm7d0PA&feature=related

All 3 albums can be downloaded COMPLETELY FREE OF CHARGE from The Weeknd's official website, just follow the link below, enjoy, and give yourself a few solid hours to experience this musical ecstasy.  It will change you in a very weird way.

Click Here to Download Music by The Weeknd

Life in the 403

Hello world!  I have dropped off the face of the blogging planet since my big move to Alberta (both on this site and on ashleydempster.wordpress.com) BUT...now that it is minus fortyfuckingtwo degrees outside...I am cuddled up securely under the blankets of my big fluffy bed on the top floor of an apartment complex in  south Calgary...and I have absolutely no excuse NOT to get back on the blog train.  So.  I will begin by briefing whoever may stumble upon this post about the past 4 months of my life; beginning with the day I left Kelowna in my little dodge neon with 2 suitcases, a guitar, a full tank of gas and the latest Luke Bryan album (tailgates and tanlines...you have to listen to it or you can just stop reading right now...)

The actual leaving moment of my journey to Calgary was totally surreal.  I'd been planning on moving back "home" to Alberta for years, but from the time that I actually solidified my decision to the moment that I left seemed to absolutely fly by.  At 7AM on September 17th I had loaded the last of my things into my car and stood on the driveway with my mom, dad, sister, beagle, and my boyfriend at the time.  Nobody cried nearly as much as I thought they would, which was great, because I had an 8 hour solo drive ahead of me through the rockies.  My boyfriend promised he'd move to Calgary to be with me in a few weeks.

The drive itself was liberating.  There's something very empowering for a 20 year old girl when she conquers a 650km road trip on her own for the first time.  I arrived in Calgary safely, and spent the first 2 weeks living with my aunt and uncle until my roommate arrived and our apartment was ready to be moved into.  I started training for my new job, and really liked it a lot at first.  Everything just kind of fell into place.  My boyfriend moved to Calgary shortly after me, found a house, found a job, and things really started to fall into place with him too...until I went back to Kelowna in October.

I don't know what it was about going back to BC that changed me.  I was only at my parents place (my former home, it was very strange) for 2 days, and I spent the majority of my time on the hiking trails in total solitude.  I had a moment of clarity when I was almost at the peak of Knox Mountain, and it's hard for me to explain, but a deer wandered out of the forest and stood on the path in front of me; and all of a sudden my entire life became clearer than I ever knew was possible.

I know what you're thinking... "that freaking hippie, sounds like some sort of a weird acid trip to me..."...and I get it, it doesn't really make sense why staring face to face with a woodland creature made me decide to fly back to Calgary and end things with him...but that's honestly what did it.  In all the simplicity and stillness of the autumn air, I realized what I loved almost more than anything; adventure, nature, beauty, being outdoors, appreciating sights and sounds and feelings and emotions; things that him and I had never seen eye to eye on.  So upon my return to Calgary, I ended things after over two years together (ups and downs inclusive) and almost 3 months later, here I am, so incredibly glad that I made that decision when I did.

I continued moseying through life a little aimlessly, enjoying life in the city, finding empowerment in my newfound independence and falling in love with the little 850sqft apartment that Karley and I now call home.  I spent a lot of time meditating after the breakup, because as I'm sure you can imagine, I was feeling incredibly guilty about everything I'd put him through...letting him change his entire life to move to Calgary to be with me and then leaving him only 2 weeks after he'd arrived here.  My new friends at work would laugh and joke that I was such a bitch, which I felt was fairly accurate.  I threw my energy into working out, cooking, keeping the apartment almost OCD spotless, and working two serving jobs.  November came and went, as did December, my family came for Christmas, whose events will require an entirely separate post if I choose to discuss them (probably not, it was not a very positive time)...and now here I am, more than halfway through January.

-xo-ac <3